Editor’s note: This article is regularly updated for relevance. 

We get it, strap-ons can be a bit daunting. They come in so many different shapes, sizes, and some even with their own harnesses. So if your novice knees start trembling, that’s completely normal.

Contrary to popular belief, strap-ons aren’t exclusive to the lesbian community. People of all genders and orientations looking to have fun, hands-free, penetrative sex can appreciate a strap-on. But to help keep you focused on what matters most (AKA your comfort and pleasure) we’ve thrown together some tips to keep in mind before you buy. Feel free to thank us later!

How to shop for the perfect strap-on

Just like you’ve done for all your other sex toys, finding the best strap-on requires a little research. What’s the device made out of? Can it be used with a harness? Is it flexible? Size, etc? At first, these questions may seem completely unrelated to your user experience but as you scroll, it will become clear just how much this seemingly simple stuff matters.

Know the types

As you may have already guessed, there are two kinds of strap-ons:

• Those that require harnesses.
• And those that don’t.

Seems simple enough, right? Well, hold on, there’s more.

Harnessed strap-ons: require a harness to “strap (the dildo) on” to you or your partner. Sometimes harnessed strap-ons include a vibrator for the wearer. A few sex toy companies have designed packages that include a dildo and harness, but they’re not always the most cost-effective or practical options, especially since you can use a harness with almost any of the toys you already own. And since there a few different harness designs, you won’t know which fit you like best until you try it out.

Strapless strap-ons: don’t require any straps to keep the dildo in place. Instead, the wearer grasps their end internally – making the entire experience way more intimate than you ever could with a harness. Some of these are even designed to work with a bullet vibrator.

Feeling overwhelmed? Don’t. We’ll unpack all of this below.

As aforementioned, there are four types of harnesses:

• Corset
• G-string
• Jock fit
• Lingerie

Just as their names suggest, the differences between these harnesses are how they fit. Which means some harnesses are easier to adjust and more customizable than others. But that doesn’t make any one of them better or worse, it’s all about what you’re most comfortable with.